All For You
by Shadow Katt
Summary: Lily Evans is getting married and Severus Snape is out of options. He wants her so much, so much that he is willing to make a deal with the Dark Lord to win her affection. Why Snape joined the Death Eaters...
1. First Encounter

_Note: I really need a good Beta Reader. Must be good at Snape and general brit stuff. Please email me or say so in a review if you're interested! Thank you! Now enjoy my fic. :) _

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_**First Encounter**

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London was quiet. It was the start of July and a thick fog hung over the city. The humidity was enough to choke you and on this balmy Thursday night, the town was quiet. Thunder grumbled in the distance and heavy black clouds darkened the night sky.

Somewhere in the city, a pub was open. The warm light that flooded out onto the street was invisible to passing Muggles. Inside The Leaky Cauldron, the atmosphere could be described as gloomy. Most of the patrons had cleared out, making their way home before the storm came. A table of hags chattered quietly to themselves in the corner and a pair of warlocks were engaged in what seemed to be a very important discussion. There was a cloaked man sitting in the center of the pub, alone, pouring over some parchments.

The final patron of the Leaky Cauldron didn't exactly fit the mould of the other degenerates who talked miserably amongst themselves. A young man, dressed in a plain black robe sat alone at the bar. A curtain of black hair fell around his face as he stared intently down at something on the bar. His right hand clutched a half full glass of firewhiskey tightly, raising it for a tiny sip every few minutes. The young man hadn't said a word all night other than politely asking for his drink.

Severus Snape wasn't sure what he was doing at the Leaky Cauldron. He didn't remember setting a destination for this place nor did he remember ordering his firewhiskey. The thing that sat in front of him on the bar did help him remember why he left his flat in the first place. He took a drink. He felt miserable. He hadn't felt this way since the day she told him she didn't want anything to do with him anymore and even then, it wasn't close to the pain he felt now. His heart hung in his chest like lead and his stomach seemed to twist itself into an odd shape. He felt like crying but couldn't remember how to do it, so he just stared at that thing before him in disbelief.

Sitting in front of him was an invitation. The parchment was ornate and somewhat transparent. The lettering was shimmering gold and curly. It read:

_**You are cordially invited to witness the matrimony of:**_

_**Lily Evans**_

_**And**_

_**James Potter**_

_**Saturday, August the Twenty-third**_

_**The ceremony will be followed by dinner and dancing, dress robes required.**_

Severus felt sick again just reading the invitation again and put his firewhiskey down. He suddenly felt very ready to be in his own bed. He dropped a few sickles on the bar and stood up. He fastened his cloak and turned to leave when he nearly collided with the cloaked figure that had been pouring over parchments all night. Severus looked up at the man's face and saw ghostly white skin and blood red eyes. He didn't look human and Severus knew exactly who this man was. He was called Lord Voldemort. He already felt like he had the worst day of his life and didn't want to be harassed by this odd wizard who was thought to be responsible for a recent string of mass murders. He pushed past the tall cloaked man.

"Pardon me," Severus didn't bother to hide the annoyance in his voice. He headed for the back door which would lead him to Diagon Alley, which in turn, would lead to his bed.

"Severus, won't you join me in a nightcap?" the one called Voldemort said from his place near the bar.

Severus stopped and looked at the door, not wanting to turn around to look at that hideous face again. He wasn't puzzled by Voldemort's knowledge of his name; he was thought to be the most powerful wizard of all time. He also hated half-bloods. Snape's muggle blood from his father's side seemed to run cold at this thought and now wished for his bed more than ever.

As if reading his mind, Voldemort smiled thinly through his lipless mouth. "I just want to have a little chat."

Severus still looked at the backdoor to the Leaky Cauldron, deciding if he should stay or go.

"You forgot this," Voldemort insisted.

Severus knew what it was, it was _her_ invitation and he mentally kicked himself for leaving it on the counter. It was her last plea to him that she still wanted him in her life, even if it was to her wedding to Potter. It was her way of letting him know she wanted to see him again. Now it was in the hands of a muggleborn hating murderer. Anger boiled up inside him and he turned around.

"Give me that now," he demanded making eye contact with wizard across the bar. Voldemort's eyes shone like flames in the dull pub light and fear tugged inside Snape from somewhere.

"Sit," Voldemort ordered from his place near a table.

Severus glared at him from behind the black strands of hair that hung over his face before stalking over and sitting down. Voldemort sat down opposite him and put the invitation down on the table.

"I believe we could be of assistance to each other," he said casually. Snape said nothing and continued to glare into those red eyes.

"I know of your skills, Severus. I know of your talents."

"What skills would those be?" Snape asked dryly.

"Your interest in the Dark Arts, for example," Voldemort said as if conducting some sort of casual business interview. "Also, you're a highly skilled Occlumens, are you not?"

Snape said nothing once more.

"If you were to join my service, I could give you what it is you desire," Voldemort offered.

"You know nothing of what I want," Snape retorted, but he couldn't stop his eyes from glancing at the invitation between them for a split second.

"Yes, well you can delude yourself into believing that, Severus, and it will get you nowhere. Where will you be on August the twenty-third? Will you be at the Potter-Evans wedding raising your glass in a false toast? Will you be there to watch her give her life away to J_ames Potter_? Will you be there after that? Will she still include you in her life when she has _him_? Will she tell you when she has her first child? Her first child that should have been with you?"

Severus looked sadly at the invitation and for the first time all night, tears found him. They trickled down his cheeks as his expression softened. He stared at the piece of parchment, imagining how terrible it would be to watch Lily marry _him_. Potter would never allow him to be in her life. He would have to live without her and the thought alone made his stomach lurch.

"I can give you what you want," Voldemort's tone was no longer casual. It had turned into a persistent hiss. "All I require is your loyalty."

Severus looked up into those demonic eyes once more.

"Lily will be yours," he continued. "It will be your wedding day and she'll love you like she was meant to."

Snape closed his eyes and for a moment imagined marrying Lily. Her gown was white and she wore tiny flowers in her hair. She carried a bouquet of lilies and her green eyes glittered with happiness as she looked up at him, smiling. He could feel cozy warmth spread inside him as he gazed down at her. Their guests called for a kiss and Severus smiled broadly as he looked back down at his bride. When he looked at her again, however, her eyes were empty. She looked emotionless, almost dead and she called his name mournfully. "Severus…"

His eyes jerked open and he found himself facing Voldemort once again. "No," he said finally. "I know who you are and I know what you do, I don't want to be any part of it."

"Surely a sensible young man such as yourself can see the obvious benefits from being in my employ?"

"I don't care," Severus said angrily and grabbed the invitation. "I'm nineteen. I'm not a murderer."

"Not murder, sacrifices for the cause," Voldemort said simply. "And that is not what I would require from you."

"My answer is no," Severus got up and headed for the door.

"We'll meet again, Severus," Voldemort responded.

Severus said nothing and slammed the door behind him. When he turned onto Diagon Alley the thunder overhead was rumbling loudly. A sharp crack and a burst of lightning informed him the clouds overhead were ready to explode. Diagon Alley was deserted and he felt extremely vulnerable.

'_That was a stupid thing to do_,' he criticized himself as he dashed past Gringotts. He could feel the first of the rain hit his cheeks. He wanted to apparate home but knew couldn't seem to concentrate. The rain came harder now and by the time he reached the door to his flat over a tiny apocethary, he was soaked. He let himself in and shut the door behind him, locking and bolting the door. After he pulled off his wet cloak he peeled his wet robes off himself and left them in a pile on his the floor of his tiny flat. There wasn't much to say about his apartment. He had a small bed, a night table, dresser, armchair and a desk. A dingy lavatory was connected to a tiny kitchen and there wasn't much else. Severus found a pair of gray pajama pants in his dresser and slipped them on. He reached over to his night table and picked up a framed photo that sat on top of it. He looked down in the smiling faces of himself and Lily, just fifteen years old.

The picture was taken in Hogsmeade, at the start of their fifth year. He remembered it like it was yesterday. The pair of them had just come from the Three Broomsticks and were ready to go back to the castle when Aurora Sinistra stopped them from the corner near Honeydukes. She asked if she could take their picture with her new camera. Snape was about to decline when Lily said yes at once. She stood close to him and smiled brightly. Severus could feel her cloaked arm bump against his and his heart fluttered. When Aurora was finished, she promised them both a copy when she developed the film.

Snape's thin finger traced Lily's smiling face and he could feel tears well up in his eyes once again. He wondered if Lily had kept her copy of the picture. How could he let this happen? How could he have allowed Lily to fall in love with _James_ _Potter_? No, Snape dismissed that thought. There was no way she loved him. Severus sat there for a long time, lost in thought, just staring at the happy young pair behind the glass.

Voldemort had said he wanted Snape's loyalty. He knew that he was a gifted with the Dark Arts and Occlumency. Severus could see why both skills would be valued by someone such as Lord Voldemort. He knew, however, what Voldemort's Death Eaters did. Lucius Malfoy was one of them and had changed considerably since they had left school. He had become colder and somehow hollower. There was a time at the end of his fifth year that the notion of pureblood supremacy seemed to be right. Lucius had been planting the idea in his head for months. After that terrible word slipped from his mouth and was directed at Lily, he had abandoned those ideas. After seeing what just one word could do, Severus gave up on the pureblood matter for good.

Voldemort had also said that he didn't require Snape to hurt anyone. Perhaps he just wanted a spy. A spy who knew Occlumency would be extremely valuable…

Severus lay down on his small bed and covered himself with his blanket. He clutched the photo of himself and Lily to his chest and closed his eyes. Lord Voldemort was extremely powerful and Snape didn't have a doubt in his mind that he was capable of fixing his relationship with Lily. If he spied for Voldemort a few times Lily would be his forever. She wouldn't marry James, they could be together. They could get married and have children and grow old together. Ever since he first saw her when they were children themselves, he had always felt like he belonged with her - _to her_.

Now, he was out of options. Either he was in Voldemort's service or Lily would be gone forever. He knew it would be dangerous, but if he didn't have Lily, what was the point of living?

As he fell asleep his slumber was flooded with an array of strange dreams. The first he was haunted by a large serpent which seemed to follow him everywhere he went. He had another dream where he went to Lily's wedding, but during the reception James used levicorpus on him and everyone laughed. The strangest dream was of Lily, trapped some place dark. There were flashes of green light and she screamed a terrible scream. Severus awoke with a start, the photo still tight in his grip. He could see out the window that the sky was just turning its first shade of purple in the early hours. He put his head back down on his pillow and sighed.

As he drifted back to sleep, his dreams took a different route. He dreamt of him and Lily lying side by side in the grass beneath a warm summer sun. Her eyes matched the grass around her and sparkled happily as she gazed at him. She giggled and brushed a strand of his dark hair from his face. His heart was soaring and he knew this is exactly how everything should be.

When he awoke again, the sun was high in the sky. He crawled out of bed and placed his treasured photo back on his night table. The sky was clear and there was a memory in his head that was just as clear on that Friday morning. When he had been vying for Lily's forgiveness in their sixth year he made a promise to her. She was unreceptive at the time but a promise was a promise. He promised her he would do _anything_ for her.

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_Please review. I really love feedback it helps me like you wouldn't believe. Also like I said at the top, I need a good beta reader. If you're good at Snape and grammar please email me or say so in a review and I'll definitely get back to you. Thanks so much!_


	2. Rite of Passage

_Note: I really need a good Beta Reader. Must be good at Snape and general brit stuff. Please email me or say so in a review if you're interested! Thank you! Now enjoy my fic. :) _

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**Rite of Passage**

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Friday night found Severus back at the Leaky Cauldron; half hoping Voldemort wouldn't be there. He had been bent on the prospect of this plan all day and found it impossible to concentrate on anything. Every time he closed his eyes all he could see what her shining green eyes and fiery red hair. Receiving the invitation yesterday was a painful reminder of how much he loved Lily Evans. He believed more than anything they belonged to each other and he had thought of her nearly every day since she stopped speaking to him all together in their sixth year. A day didn't go by that Severus didn't want to owl her and see if she was ready to forgive him. He could never bring himself to do it for fear of being rejected by her for the thousandth time. He was convinced if James Potter hadn't asked her out in their seventh year, Lily would have forgiven him by now. Instead she fell in with _that lot_ and forgot about him. No, Severus thought, she didn't forget. How could she forget if they were meant to be?

None of that mattered now. What mattered now is that Severus would have help getting her back. Someone was going to actually help him fix things with Lily. He was convinced that once she saw how sorry he was and how much he loved her, she would forgive him. She would finally see how foolish it was to give her life to _James Potter_ and everything would be right again.

A familiar cloaked figure sat alone at a dark corner table. Seeing as it was Friday the pub was significantly more crowded than the previous night and Severus felt awkward joining the company of a man who was becoming widely known and feared. Still, anything for her.

He took a deep breath to calm his nerves and made his way to the dimly lit corner. It seemed as if Lord Voldemort was waiting for him. He surveyed Severus through squinted eyes and a smirk came across his pale features. He didn't look the least bit surprised to see Snape.

"Severus," he hissed. "Please, have a seat."

Severus obeyed and sat opposite Voldemort, folding his arms around him instinctively.

"You've made your decision then?" Voldemort asked, but didn't wait for an answer. Severus could feel him boring into his mind, igniting a sharp pain in the back of his head. "Yes," Voldemort continued. "You have."

"I won't kill anyone," Snape said defiantly.

"Of course not," Voldemort was still smirking. "As I told you before, I require a skilled Occlumens to complete some undercover work for me. You would just need to report to me what you observe at your post."

"Where would I be posted?" Severus asked, his curiosity taking over.

"I need information on your old headmaster, Albus Dumbledore. I need to know what if he's planning something and someone with your talents should have no problem completing the task."

Severus suddenly felt very aware of the dozens of people in the bar, and while they seemed to be having an enjoyable, rowdy Friday evening, he couldn't help but wonder what if the Ministry was listening in?

Would he be a criminal for associating with this wizard? "What sort of information?" he asked.

"You'll be informed of the particulars later on," Voldemort responded.

Severus was quiet. He looked down at the table, but still felt those terrible eyes on him. He could feel him listening to his thoughts and quickly shut his mind. Voldemort made a slight noise but Snape didn't look up. He would be expected to get information from Dumbledore. How? Voldemort said he would tell him later. What if he had to do something ridiculous like use polyjuice to impersonate Professor McGonagall? What would Voldemort do with the real McGonagall? Severus cringed. Dumbledore and McGonagall had always been very kind to Severus during his time there, and he hadn't forgotten it. He was sent to Dumbledore's office many times for improper use of hexes and curses and never once did Dumbledore yell at him. He was always expecting it, but it never came. That was always a shock to Severus seeing as when he was home, his father did nothing but yell at him. Dumbledore, however, just chatted with Severus each time he was in his office. He would always offer sweets and talk to Severus about regular things like the Quidditch season, his outstanding grades, and how he thought the pumpkins were coming in nicely that year. McGonagall always seemed to be more understanding with him than most. She must have known how shy and scared he was his first year and introduced him to prefect, Lucius Malfoy, who took Snape under his wing. That certainly made going away to school easier. McGonagall helped him excel academically and always encouraged him to try harder. Severus knew these were people who he did not want to betray.

Then, the thought of Lily danced into his head. He looked back up at Voldemort. "And she'll be mine?"

"Mind, body and soul," Lord Voldemort looked delighted. "You have my word."

"I won't kill anyone," Snape repeated.

"Of course not," Voldemort also repeated.

"Then I'll do it. I'll do anything for her," Severus said, he could feel a knot in his stomach.

"That's very touching," Voldemort showed no warmth. "You'll be joining me then, straight away. Let's go." Voldemort stood up and fastened his cloak tighter around his neck.

"Right now?" Severus felt confused. Where were they going?

"Yes, right now," Voldemort sounded annoyed and Snape took that as his cue to follow and not ask questions. He followed the older wizard out the back entrance to the pub, earning some curious looks along the way. When they were out of sight, Voldemort grabbed Severus's arm with his long white fingers and before he realized it, he was be apparated somewhere.

A moment later he found himself in the foyer of a grand home. A large elegant staircase wound its way up two floors. The moving portraits on the walls told him he was in a magical home. The walls were covered in old fashioned dark green wallpaper and the wainscoting along the bottom was dark ebony colored wood. The house felt strangely familiar and he realized that this was where the Blacks lived. Regulus had brought him to visit once but the torment he endured from Sirius was unbearable and he left rather quickly. He could hear people talking in an adjacent room and followed Voldemort in that direction.

Chatting over brandy, in an elegant parlor, was what looked like a Slytherin reunion party. Lucius Malfoy was there with Narcissa Black and Bellatrix of course, with her new husband Rodolphus Lestrange. Snape had heard she was getting married but never received an invitation. Regulus Black and Jonathan Avery rounded out the group and each one of them looked entirely too young to be here, just like him. They looked up at Severus and Voldemort as they entered the room. Each of them immediately dropped to one knee, head bowed before the man that stood next to Severus. Snape felt the entire scene was overdramatic and had no intentions of bowing before anyone. So these were the Death Eaters.

"My Lord!" Bellatrix exclaimed with glee. "The Black family is humbled by your return to our home."

"Yes, Bella," Voldemort sounded bored. "I believe you all know Severus Snape."

There were murmurs as the small group of Death Eaters got back on their feet. Lucius stepped forward at once, graciously shaking Severus's hand. "My dear old friend, I haven't seen you in ages."

"Lucius, good to see you," Severus smiled. Lucius Malfoy was always someone Snape looked up to and would be eager to work with him.

"Severus has given me his allegiance," Voldemort said.

Severus caught a strange expression on Lucius' face that was quickly replaced by, what Snape would describe as false happiness.

"Well, then he is to complete the rite, right My Lord?" Bellatrix said rather cruelly.

Rite? What rite? Severus couldn't help but wonder what he was in store for. He looked at Lucius for some kind of clue, but the blonde wizard quickly diverted his eyes to the floor. Snape felt panic bubble inside him.

"Severus you will complete the rite of passage into my service," Voldemort confirmed.

Snape said nothing and tried very hard to hide his fear.

"Bellatrix, wont you get us prepared in the sitting room?" Voldemort's request sounded like a command. He wasn't taking his eyes off Snape and Snape felt at once that he had made a terrible mistake.

"Yes my Lord," she crooned and set off at once.

After what felt like eons of silence, Bellatrix finally returned and informed Voldemort that everything was ready. Severus followed the group into the Black Family sitting room and upon seeing what was in store for him; he wanted to run like hell.

A circle was traced on the floor of black candles that sparked rather than burned and Severus recognized these as candles used in the darkest of rituals. There was an oddly shaped goblet on a nearby table and the liquid inside looked very dark. His stomach lurched and he became very aware that someone was about to perform Cruorum Incantatem, a blood ritual. He didn't need it explained to him, he knew enough of the Dark Arts to see what was about to happen. He was to make a blood vow to Voldemort.

Snape suddenly felt young and vulnerable. He was the youngest person here, at just nineteen, and knew he belonged somewhere else on a Friday night. He suddenly felt angry. Why was it that James Potter was most likely spending his Friday night with Lily while Severus had to give up his life just so she would accept his apology and maybe give him a chance? It wasn't fair and Snape wished for a normal life more than ever.

Voldemort stepped inside the circle of candles and motioned for Severus to join him. A tiny hiccup of fear found its way up his throat. He closed his eyes tightly and thought of Lily. This was for her, this was for them. He imagined her smiling face, her eyes warm with adoration for him. The thought of Lily alone was enough for Severus to do anything and he joined Voldemort in the circle of dark candles. He didn't need to be told to take out his wand and he raised it to meet Voldemort's. As the wands met, they became magnetically attached to each other and the sparkling candles turned into tall purple flames.

Voldemort started to recite an incantation in a language Snape had never heard. He could feel the floorboards beneath him tremble and the Death Eaters retreated from the sitting room. Voldemort narrowed his eyes on Severus, they were now glowing like red hot flames, and he continued to speak in a dark language. He lowered his wand suddenly and Severus thought for a split second that it was over. Voldemort grabbed his left forearm and a pain like Severus had never imagined came. His arm felt like it was on fire and he looked down to see blood pouring from beneath Voldemort's vice-like grip. Snape let out an uncontrollable shriek in agony and fell to his knees before Voldemort, his arm hanging over his head clumsily and the blood running down to his shoulder now.

"Severus Snape," Voldemort started. His horrible red eyes seemed to burn into Severus's very being. "Do you pledge your loyalty to me, the Dark Lord Voldemort?"

"Yes," Severus managed to say, through gritted teeth.

"Will you serve me at all expenses until your last dying breath, under penalty of paying for treachery with blood?"

"Yes, Lord Voldemort," Severus whimpered.

Then, a new pain arrived. Voldemort tightened his grip on Snape's arm and he howled in agony. It felt like his bones were being crushed into powder. "I am your master now and you will refer to me as your Dark Lord." Smoke was rising from his forearm now.

Severus's eyes stung with tears as he tried so hard to think of Lily to block the torture he was enduring. "Yes, my Lord," he cried.

Voldemort released his grasp on Snape's arm. Severus clutched his bleeding arm from his place on the floor, the tears pouring down his face. Voldemort placed the goblet of dark liquid in front of him. "Drink," he ordered. Severus grimaced as he realized he wasn't finished and picked up the cup with his right hand. The liquid inside was thick and syrupy. It was the color of dark rubies and smelled like a mixture of death and decay. He fought back the urge to vomit.

'It's for Lily,' he told himself. The thought of her marrying James and bearing his children made him feel like vomiting even more than the mystery drink before him and he raised the goblet to his lips. Voldemort watched in anticipation. He closed his eyes and drank it. The room started to spin around him and nothing became distinguishable. The red of those hideous eyes, the evil purple flames, and the dark color of his blood spilled on the Black's sitting room floor, it was all blurred together. Severus knew he was going down and hit the floor with a thud. He watched the bottom of Voldemort's cloak leave him alone before everything went dark.

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_Please review. I really love feedback it helps me like you wouldn't believe. Also like I said at the top, I need a good beta reader. If you're good at Snape and grammar please email me or say so in a review and I'll definitely get back to you. Thanks so much!_


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